A Satirical Report By HARIS IQBAL
Seniors at Jericho High School have set a precedent of cutting classes every once in a while during their final year of school. However, the class of 2022 has taken this tradition to an unprecedented level. They’ve had a total of 54 cut days, and that’s just the fall semester.
Seniors report that their reasons for cutting aren’t to just get away from school for a day, but rather to stick to true Jericho customs like studying, completing college applications, and mentally preparing for college decisions.
Sam Jackson reported that he was over the moon when he found out that November 1st would be a cut day. He claimed that he had no Halloween social interaction the night before. “I just stayed home and tried finishing my activity list. The thing is, I fell asleep at 7 p.m. and woke up the next morning relieved when I remembered we were cutting,” said Jackson.
Ivy League hopeful senior Sam Jackson skipped school to work on his college application. “Having the day off was really nice as I needed the whole day to come up with my 2 activities on my early decision Cornell application,” he said.
Along with students cutting the day before their applications were due, teachers reported their students cutting classes on their decision days. Ms. Jackson reported that in the last week of school in December, the week when most ED’s came out, she had fewer than 50% attendance every day. The same was said during the end of March when many seniors were cutting every 2 or 3 days. On top of that, seniors were cutting because their friends’ college decisions came out and they wanted to be there for them on a day that determines the rest of their friends’ lives.
One class that almost every senior takes is AP Gov, and with it comes very stressful tests. Throughout the year, teachers reported that the majority of students in their classes cut every 3 weeks. This remained a mystery as to why they were doing it. However AP Gov teacher Ms. Hynes noticed something of a pattern that differed between the seniors in her AP Gov and her AP Psych classes. Ms. Hynes said, “I noticed that the day before every Gov exam, my seniors were marked cut.”
She discovered that her students were cutting the days before their AP Gov exams in order to get in an extra day of studying.
College decision day was May 1st, a Tuesday, and guess what? Seniors cut on Monday, April 30th in order to prepare their outfits for school the next day. John Williams claimed that Decision Day is such a big event in Jericho High School, especially for the video yearbook. “I gotta be dripped out in my NCC merch, and yeah if that takes the whole day for me to prepare, so be it.”
The 2022 seniors’ reasons for cutting were unexpected and many predict that next year’s seniors will be more of the same. We’ll just have to wait and see if the class of 2023 can make the cut.